by Antonio Zodda ‘14
After a fair share of Christmases on this earth, I’ve compiled a list of 10 songs, 5 of which make my mind numb at the thought of hearing them for the 5,697,145th time. The other 5, although not always played on those controversial 24-hour Christmas stations, deserve to be sought after.
Underplayed
“Fairytale of New York” The Pogues and Kirsty MacColl
When I first listened to “Fairytale of New York”, I immediately wanted to hear it again. This folk ballad, despite its enormous popularity in Ireland and the UK, enjoys little more than a cult following in the U.S. outside the pub scene. Shane MacGowan and the late Kirsty MacColl’s back-and-forth vocals go exceptionally well with one another and the piece is tied together by the distinct piano riff and Celtic string arrangement. An essential for every Christmas collection.
“Father Christmas” The Kinks
In this heartwarming carol about mugging Santa Claus, The Kinks deliver the usual odd yet highly satisfying brand of early British punk rock that made them famous. At its heart, the song is really about the struggles facing working class families around Christmas time, and includes a less than subtle jab at the wealthy. It is an avant-garde anthem with a real message.
“Thank God It’s Christmas” Queen
Freddie Mercury’s bellowing tenor and the band’s definitive harmonies are enough of a reason for you to put this song in its rightful place in your holiday collection. It is as positive as it is powerful, straying away from that “Blue Christmas” mentality that is heard in far too many holiday pieces. It has that classic fun Queen spirit and never takes itself too seriously.
“Christmas Must Be Tonight” The Band
Titles rarely do a good Christmas song justice and this is especially true with this piece by The Band. The name makes it sound like any generic Christmas tune but The Band’s stylish blend of country and rock resonates deeply in the hearts of romantic listeners and tells the story of Christmas in a whole new way. Robbie Robertson and the gang put their hearts into the track.
“Christmas in the Trenches” John McCutcheon
No list of underplayed songs is complete without a folk tune. What sets this one apart from the countless other folk carols never making their way to a broadcast station is how remarkably stripped away it is from the tropes like sleigh bells and pop beats that dominate the airwaves. Yet it still retains artistic integrity. “Christmas in the Trenches” tells the true story of a World War I ceasefire on Christmas between Germany and England from the view of a British soldier. In its simplicity, the song exemplifies the true meaning of Christmas.
Overplayed
“Wonderful Christmastime” Paul McCartney
While criticizing the work of a Beatle is something that I don’t do frequently, this little ditty without question deserves the “overplayed” accolade. It is three minutes and forty-five seconds of everything that was wrong with Wings and delivers a brief but grave foreshadowing of the onslaught of insufferable synth-driven “music” that we called the 1980s.
“Christmas Eve Sarajevo 12/24” Trans-Siberian Orchestra
This may be the only “good” song on the list. I’m not attacking this song for its content, but rather because there are dozens of other great TSO jams that remain unplayed on the radio. This piece is brilliant, especially live, but so is basically every other decked-out TSO classical arrangement and original. You will definitely be doing yourself a favor by buying one of their more obscure albums.
“All I Want for Christmas Is You” Mariah Carey
This is the epitome of a bad Christmas song, and as we have all seen, with bad songs come great airtime. This is without a doubt the most played song on the list and due to its enormous popularity (it has sold millions of copies) has been one of the most played Christmas pop songs since its 1994 release.
“Last Christmas” Wham
Michael and Ridgeley’s holiday opus is, at its core, a sort of feeble attempt at writing an anti-love song 80s hit. Between the countless covers and relentless overuse in movies and ads, this song is an unfortunately unavoidable and integral part of the holiday repertoire.
Anything Sung By Children
You know the ones I’m talking about: “I Want a Hippopotamus for Christmas,” “All I want for Christmas Is My Two Front Teeth,” “I’m Gettin’ Nuttin For Christmas,” etc. These cringeworthy tunes sung by gender-ambiguous 6-year-olds from the 1920s ruin any car ride fast. While I understand that some folks are into oversimplified, dated, and repetitive Christmas songs, I will never comprehend the average DJ’s obsession with these holiday-season aural train wrecks.
